About Me

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I'm Ryan, and I don't particularly understand the importance of a Blog... but I'll Blog away anyway. Positively, it gives me a wall to talk to. I like having formation and fluency in my day. 'About Me'?... just read the Blog.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

One minute to Sunday

"Hush, little baby, don't say a word,
Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird.
If that mockingbird don't sing,
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring..."

Yesterday started off well. My alarm didn't go off and I slept through to about 9:30. It was raining and I met the One-eyed Magpie again... after all these months. He was sitting on the verandah, out of the rain, and had to skew his head is such a freakish way to see me... considering his lack of eyeball in the right side of his skull. Here he is, chilling with some little Hindu statuettes of my Father's.

I used to see him in and around the yard and he was never scared of me. I would walk up to him and take photos and he'd crow at me and hop around. One day, he followed me the entire way to school, landing on bins ahead of me and skewing his head, crowing and hopping. I called him Odin. I have such a Shakespearean fear that he is a bad omen... although it's been a very drawn out omen and I've ignored him quite a bit and I'm still alive. The way he speaks really freaks me out. It's like he's speaking in tongue. It's such a long, sequential melody of squarks and coughs. I felt I should have given him a pat on the back and asked how he was feeling... but I was scared he'd dramatically throw his head to the side, staring into my soul and future with his grey, glassy eye and steals my dreams... or something similar. With the eye and talons and black feathers he seems a foul mixture of Poe's 'the Raven' and 'the Tell-Tale Heart', embodied in one crowing, hopping freakshow that I call Odin.

Tom's party was good too. I had my feet vomited on twice. Eli managed to get it in my sock. Thank God both drunks were coordinated enough to both vomit on a different shoe each. As Nick said "I may be drunk, but I'm not inconsiderate". I poured water over my feet to clean them as much as I could. Poor Eli... he drank too much. Stupid Eli... he drank too much. Nick too, that boy needs to pace himself. Still, the gold medal goes to William who I thought was dead. I bet he's regretting it this morning. Dykes managed to go the entire night without a drink but still came across as really drunk. I sang "hush little baby" to Nick after he wouldn't stop yelling and vomiting everywhere, sometimes both at once. It's not hard to realise why I hate alcohol. I also have quite a few unusual photographs on my camera, taken by Nick before he collapsed.

The curtain is a bit out of place. Caitlin and I also got to race time, trying to get home before Sunday. Having only a few minutes until midnight and racing (slowly and responsibly) home we managed to do it. We got home with one minute to go. Take that Chronos, master of Time!

Last note; I have 4 followers! Soon I'll have a fellowship and we can go throw things in volcanos. I'm also very proud to have the evil Lord Voldemort amoung my followers.

"You have my bow."

"You have my axe!"

"You have my magic wand."

"You have my blog."



  1. Are you on holiday now? {Cause you can sleep in}
    Lucky those Hindu statuettes aren't shiny, or maybe the one-eyed magpie would have stolen them!
    Ha, Odin is a pretty fitting name for an omen. Maybe he is one. I am scared of birds, but I think this one isn't a bad omen, considering you're still alive. I bet you have dead relatives {who hasn't. duh.}, maybe he's the reincarnation of one of them. Hey, do you have any dead relatives with their names starting with O?

    Interesting photographs, especially the one of the mouth. I hate alcohol too.

    Thank you for mentioning me, that made my day.
    And YES YES YES LOTR REFERENCES {who would've thought that Lord Voldemort is a LOTR fan?}

    BTW, I listened to air-conditioned nightmare and I liked it! Why did you think I wouldn't?

  2. Its an odd song, from an odd band. No reason beyond that... I'm glad you liked it! No one I know does.
    No relatives with 'O' as far as I know... although I love the name Odessa. I'll assume my dead Great Uncle is named Odessa and is also, currently, a magpie... until I research.

    Hahaha, I knew you'd love the LOTR reference.